Fasting From Regret

The last few days have become days of re-evaluation for me. It started with the cleaning out of a few boxes in the garage a couple of weeks ago. Now, unbidden, this self evaluation extended itself into times of quiet sitting and listening, especially during and after last week's snow storm. Truly a time of grace.

I've been thinking about where I've been, where I've come from and analysing where I need to go from here. I suppose many people in mid-mid-life do this sort of thing. But, I've been too busy up until now to be very "interior" about my self-evaluation. Kids, home, career, and church have all claimed more than their share of attention.

Now it's time to focus in on the core things. These other parts of my life are valuable, but they are not me, I've decided. And life is WAY too short to evaluate one's life based on what "might have been" or on what others have done or left undone.

What is me, though? A tough question to answer, but one only God and I can wrestle with.

Rerum, Deus, tenax vigor

Mid-Afternoon Office Hymn composed by St Ambrose of Milan



O God, you hold all things in space,
Each star and planet in its place,
The days and years are your design,
Each change of season you define.


As we life's eventide draw near,
us your light, remove our fear,
With happy death may we be blessed,
And find in you eternal rest.

"The Office"... Hymns, that is.

One of the joys of my retreat this past weekend was my rediscovery of the Latin Office hymns for Advent. They sound REALLY COOL in Latin. But, since I am neither proficient in Latin like my friend Antony H., nor good at music as well as posting music on a blog, I'll have to settle for sharing the words alone, in translation.

Creator of the stars of night,

Your people's everlasting light,

O Christ, Redeemer of us all,

We pray you hear us when we call.

In sorrow that the ancient curse

Should doom to death a universe,

You came, O Savior, to set free

Your own in glorious liberty.

When this old world drew on toward night,

You came; but not in splendor bright,

Not as a monarch, but the child

Of Mary, blameless mother mild.

At your great Name, O Jesus, now

All knees must bend, all hearts must bow;

All things on earth with one accord,

Like those in heaven, shall call you Lord.

Come in your holy might, we pray,

Redeem us for eternal day;

Defend us while we dwell below

From all assaults of our dread foe.

To God the Father, God the Son,

And God the Spirit, Three in One,

Praise, honor, might, and glory be

From age to age eternally.