Pugnacious Ignatius

The system won't let me copy and post graphics here on the computers at SJU Collegeville, but here is a great quote for the feast day of St. Ignatius Loyola.

Like its author and the Society of Jesus he founded, the quote takes no prisoners. But, it rings true. This is so especially in light of my week-long conference here at St John's University Collegeville with that OTHER world-changing society, the Companions of Christ. There's not much time or facility for blogging right now, but trust me, this week continues to be a life-changing time. .

The breath becomes a tempest.

"It is true that the voice of God, having once penetrated the heart, becomes strong as the tempest and loud as the thunder. But before reaching the heart it is as weak as a light breath that scarcely agitates the air. It shrinks from noise and is silent amid agitation."

Merton on "I" Sight

MY LORD GOD,

I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think

that I am following your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you.
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore will I trust you always
though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Thomas Merton

Meditation on Annunciation:Through the Thick Fog, My "I" Sight is Failing

This morning and last Saturday we experienced thick fog here in the Twin Cities of Minnesota. I was driving to morning Mass on both days and had that eirie experience of not being able to see very far in front of the car at all.

It reminded me of how often we fly "on instruments" with God. There are many times when we aren't quite sure about God's will.... what the heck.... there are times when we are quite sure that we are completely unaware of God's will. During times like these our vision narrows, and we can only see the few square feet of real estate in front of us, and even that limited field of vision seems strangely unfamiliar. Our "I" sight fails us.

Brother Antony H. once again let us know this in an effective way with 2 posts on Sunday, March 25th about "The Mountain." The first, a cartoon piece, is priceless and speaks to our "perspective" in climbing. The second post, a Zen reading ,also indicates that sometimes near- sighted focussing can be helpful to our trek toward the Summit.

So it came as a comfort to hear this morning at Mass that our mother Mary wondered at the angel's presence and words during the Annuciation (Luke 1:26-38).

And coming to [Mary], [the angel] said,

“Hail, full of grace!

The Lord is with you.”

But she was greatly troubled at what was said

and pondered what sort of greeting this might be.

Then the angel said to her,“Do not be afraid, Mary,

for you have found favor with God."

It wasn't immediately clear in Mary's mind what was happening to her or why. That is the miraculous essence of her "fiat," her willingness to let it be done according to God's will and word, no matter what she could or could not comprehend.

Maybe we can recall that next time we get a little lost in the fog.

I am also reminded of a Lenten chorus we sing in my home parish. It is almost mournful in tune, but encouraging in tone. Forgive me for not citing the author. Please let me know if you are aware of who wrote this wonderful song so I can give them proper credit:

The Cloud’s Veil

Even though the rain hides the stars,
even though the mist swirls the hills,
even when the dark clouds veil the sky,
You are by my side.

Even when the sun shall fall in sleep,
even when at dawn the sky shall weep,
even in the night when storms shall rise,
You are by my side.

Things matter: What's in YOUR cell?

Continuing through the topics covered in Meg Funk's fine book, Thoughts Matter, I have been thinking about "things." It's one of eight areas of thought life discussed by the Desert Fathers, specifically listed in Cassian's Conferences.

I was surprised to find in Meg Funk's book an emphasis on the importance of letting go of "things" in the vowed monastic life. I had assumed, wrongly, that because vowed religious give up ownership of things as part of their vowed existence, that ownership simply wasn't important anymore.

Foolish me.

Giving up something outwardly is only the first step, according to Cassian. The real battle, and the real value, is found in giving up the inner attachment. Here's is Meg Funk's take:

"We cannot put an end to our desire for things by having a large or small sum of money. We can only do that by virtue of renunciation and [Cassian] urges us to root out the desire to acquire as well as the wish to retain. No number of things can satisfy the grasping, greedy impulse of avarice."

How true. Visually this came to me as a question: what's in your cell?

I have my fellow blogger Antony H. to thank for a recent reminder of the cell's importance. The picture above, Cell of the 6th hermit St. Cyriac at Sousakim, south-west of Jerusalem fairly close to the shore of the Dead Sea, comes courtesy of Antony also.

The cell is defined as the place where the monastic meets God, where he or she wrestles with day to day living, hidden away from the world's observation.

I looked into my cell. What did I find there?

A variety of "things" and concern about "things." Looking at these concerns and cares was very healthy. It granted me a new freedom to get outside myself, outside my daily practice, outside my work and my "mission and ministry" to see aspects of my life which usually go tooling on their merry way unexamined.

A tres healthy process to go through for the spirit.

But a greater surprise to me was that in my cell there were also people.... and when it comes to discernment, those people are also "things." I'm not talking about "using" people or the evil of "objectifying" others as foils for our own desires, fears etc. That's sin.

Instead, I observe that people by their very nature, like physical things, have a spiritual force field, a gravitational attraction, if you will. This "pull" of people in my life makes them as much in need of a good discerning examination as the other physical "things" of which our lives are made.

After it was over (this round at least) I called this process a Spring Cleaning. It fits because right now here in Minnesota we are beginning to emerge from our wintry cocoons to take stock of the house, the yard, the garden and get ready for the riotous few months of outdoor pleasure which God grants the true Minnesotan.

In societal terms, this time is a perfect companion to the Lenten journey, which is its spiritual counterpart.

More from Meg:

"When we consent to a serious relationship with God, grace follows. Cassian notes that none of us has to do all the practices of the spiritual life. But many who answer the inner light begin, through inclination after inclination, to make choices from a discerning heart. Over time, this practice becomes a lifestyle."

What's in YOUR cell?

Discerning Between God and God's Works

I dedicate this post to the memory of Bishop Paul Dudley, retired (Diocese of Sioux Falls, SD). He died this past Wednesday night. He will be remembered by many as a tireless pastor and lover of our Lord and His Church.

Eternal rest grant unto him, O Lord,

and let perpetual light shine upon him.

May his soul and the souls of all the faithful departed,

through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

The first time I met Bishop Dudley he spoke at length on a book called Five Loaves and Two Fish, by Francis Xavier Nguyen Van Thuan. I will not ever forget that talk.

Nguyen Van Thuan, as the new Bishop of Saigon, had been targeted for his faith as well as his family connection to Ngo Dinh Diem. He was detained by the Communist Government of Vietnam in a reeducation camp for 13 years, 9 of them in solitary confinement. During his imprisonment he wrote encouraging remarks and notes on scraps of paper which were passed to the outside world.

Cardinal Van Thuan ( elevated in 2001) shared some of his thoughts at the 1997 World Youth Day, which become the basis for the book and Bishop Dudley's own remarks. One piece struck me especially hard; Discerning Between God and God's Works.

Cardinal Van Thuan had ample opportunity to do this during his imprisonment. 48 years old and energetic, cut off from his flock and the ability to actively minister to them, Bishop Van Thuan was tortured by his enforced idleness.

One day the divine message came to him.

Everything you desire to do is excellent work, helping others, increasing vocations, providing reassurance to your flock and evangelizing non Christians. These are God's works, but they are not God.

Bishop Van Thuan was called by his isolation in prison to realize what is true for all who are involved in the active life. What we do for God is good, but it is not the goal or summit of our lives. Rather, we are called to follow God Himself.

This is important to remember always, but especially when we have good success in our lives or alternatively when we experience dejection and failure. At both times, at ALL times we can pray with Cardinal Van Thuan the words he wrote from prison:

Why, Lord are you

abandoning me?

I do not want to desert your work,
I want to complete it....

Kneeling before your altar
close to the eucharist,

I heard your answer, Lord:

"It is me you are supposed to be
following, not my work."